just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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