He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Do vagina's smell?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
