I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
