I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
