i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Randomize
