They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
