Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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