Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
