can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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