I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
