Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
