Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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