I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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