And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
