I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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