I hate all girls vehemently.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
