we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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