Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I just made out with a guy for $7.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
