My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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