i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
