Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
