i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
