I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
NoShamevember. You game?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
