Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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