Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We were destined to go to rehab together
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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