Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize