): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Let's get the cat blown out
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Randomize