super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
