She just used a chaser for red wine.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize