this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
