we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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