we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
