dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
