So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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