What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
