just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
