at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
