He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
