I didn't shave. On purpose
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
All the doctor said was why
The adults are the big ones right?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize