she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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