You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Randomize
