Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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