The maid of honor just puked.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
