ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I need moral support for this bender
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
