I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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