i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
