pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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