You really coming over, don't trick.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
