i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i just wanna soil my oats bro
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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