im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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